Top Chef Canada Episode 3 Recap: Vegans Don't Eat the Best Stuff.


We waste no time, we're in Quickfire land. And Hey! It's Strombo! And Hey! He's a vegan now. Of course he is. When Calgary Chris sadly says "Vegans don't eat all the best stuff" it makes me love him a little bit.  Maybe I was wrong about you, guy.  Strombo tells them to not drown Mother Nature's good work with "over creativity".

The Brit's big advice when cooking vegan? "Just think vegetable and you're on the right track!"

Fucking. Genius.

Crying Kayla is always the one who yells out "37 minutes, GUYS!" and "What temperature is the fryer at?!?!" So far that is her contribution to the competition.

The food is all looking pretty yummy.  I mean, I get the frustration that the chefs are feeling and I've read Bourdain's diatribes against veganism, but as someone who does eat vegan a fair amount, I'm kind of into it.  I'm also kind of into steak, so, there's that.

Then, this happened:

Insightful Bastard.
George's vegan palate was not happy with Calgary Chris' dessert, Crying Kayla's vegan home fries or the angry young butcher's foamy cold soup.

Dan, Becky and Caity are pleasing, but Dan, The Brit is the winner.


The chefs have to cook for either the cafe, bar or dining room of Sen5es (which happens to be downstairs from their dorm, errrr, condo).  They pull knives and then learn that they'll be cooking against the others who have pulled in their category and that Daniel Boulud will be judging.

Luxury Jonathan is wandering the aisles of McEwan's saying "Where are the nuts? I'm looking for nuts!"  Nicole has a crazy scar across her face from banging it into a hot pan last week.  Will it be there the whole competition? Will she ask Daniel Boulud and the GE Monogram not-Padma to "say hello to her little friend"?

McEwan walks in with his very expensive jeans and Luxury Jonathan says he's looking "fresh". He's taking notes, I can feel it. And then, he points out the thread count of the cotton shirt he's wearing.  I die.  This guy is turning into a parody of Scott Disick.  Surprisingly Expensive Shirt Matthew has nothing to say about McEwan's shirt. What is he hiding?

The cafe gang are getting ready to serve and Scarface is having a hard time finishing.  Luxury Jonathan and the immune Brit pitch in to help her. They grate cheese over her pasta, they give hugs.  It's nuts, if endearing.  Expensive Shirt Matthew is all "pffffffttttt...this is a competition!"

The judges are in love with Scarface's dish and since she is adequately appreciative for the help she received, I'm happy for her.  

The immune Brit has made a fry-up of some sort and it is too casual for them.  Luxury Jonathan's fancy-ass soup is a winner and Expensive Shirt Matthew's peach tart is delicious.

The bar group is up and Not-blonde Becky's looks cute but tastes "meh".  Jeff's is weird. Nobody gets it.  And the drink he serves with it is poison.  Wait a sec, who is Jeff?  Calgary Chris made something that goes on crackers and everyone likes it.  And he made his own cracker!  Food truck Clement made ravioli (bar food?) and it doesn't work for anyone.

The dining room group is cooking and oh, THERE'S THE SPONGETOWELS! Where have they been?????


Crying Kayla yells out the time.  Boxing Glove Caity gives her side eye.

Danny Smiles serves up a scallop that's undercooked, Chris C made a crazy elaborate plate, with foam or froth, which I'm sorry, looks like someone yakked it up. McEwan calls it a "traffic jam of a plate".  Boxing Glove Caity's halibut and braised chicken wing appears to be a hit.  Angry young butcher's pork tenderloin is too rare and there is no sauce.  Crying Kayla's braised lamb is cold and yuck...raw garlic...eeeewww.


Scarface, Calgary Chris and Boxing Glove Caity are the top 3.  And Scarface takes it.  She deserves it, I think, even though the boys helped her out.  She's humble, so whatever.  If she ever refuses to grate cheese for somebody I will rethink this whole thing.

Crying Kayla, food truck Clement and the immune Brit are the bottom 3.  The Brit got cafe and diner messed up. Clement claims that his ravioli was "pushing the envelope" and Shereen tells him "it's not IN the envelope".  Crying Kayla has apparently confused "rustic" with shitty and yet, Clement is going home to his food truck.  Good-bye, Clement, go drown your sorrows in a beer and a plate of ravioli.

Join us next time when the chefs go to a Roller Derby! Which happened on Top Chef last month. Not a rerun, just Cancon, folks!

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