YOU may already be a winner.

18.12.06

Congratulations. Beating out candidates including Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Kim Jong-il, James Baker, Rummy and Bush, YOU have been selected as Time Magazine’s “Person of the Year” for 2006.

Say what?

That's right. The annual award, which identifies the person, or people, who most affect the news and people’s daily lives, for good or ill, this year goes to anyone who has used or created content on the internet.

"For seizing the reins of the global media, for founding and framing the new digital democracy, for working for nothing and beating the pros at their own game, Time's Person of the Year for 2006 is you," the magazine's Lev Grossman wrote.

What do you think did it? Was it the fact that I kept my Flickr account updated regularly this year? I mean, if I slipped and only updated once in a while, would they have gone with Ahmadinejad? You're right. Probably not. I bet he doesn't even have a digital camera. And you GOTTA know James Baker can't even remember his password. Maybe it's because I bit the bullet and started a myspace account despite the fact that I am at least 10 years too old to be dabbling with such things. I'm pretty sure Kim Jong-il has a myspace account. Hell, he's probably on facebook too. Not me, you've got to draw the line somewhere. I'm guessing Lil' Kim's myspace profile talks a lot about hair products, being misunderstood and Tom Cruise. Now, that's just a guess, mind you, but are you going to question TIME MAGAZINE'S PERSON OF THE YEAR when she tells you something like that? No. I didn't think so. Stay down.

A few words of advice to the US Administration's Axis of Stoopid, in case they want to have a shot at making it to the top of Time's list next year:

Mr. Bush, talk more about your hair. People love that.

Rummy, talk about what moves you. Art, movies, jazz icons. I dare you!

Mr. Cheney, if your pet or your lesbian daughter ever poop on your lap or on one of those old pacemakers you keep lying around, talk about it! Maybe you'll get the sympathy vote.

Bottom line, for all three of you, spend less time waging unpopular wars and more time watching SNL digital shorts on youtube. You'll thank me later. Hopefully via email.

5 comments :

  1. Tracey,
    I read this earlier and was a-ready to post a comment, when "The Man" walked by.

    I think the Mandy P. Post put us over the top, and personally, I would like to thank the editors of Time, my people (I don't have any "people" but if I did, I would give them an giant, insincere, thanks ala a weepy, Best Actress winner) and of course, I would like to thank God, because they always thank God at the Grammy's ann I find it amusing that Grammy winners think God is hustling Grammy votes for them.

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  2. Anonymous9:51 AM

    Heya, congratulations!

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  3. I started celebrating my victory last night. Come on over. We can toast each other and rub it in faces of the people who DIDN'T win. You know. The Amish.

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  4. LMAO off at Jenn'y crack about the Amish!

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  5. Happy Holidays, Tracey.

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