Who can turn the world on with her smile?


Don't....Stop....Softening Your Image...Don't...Stop...The Primaries Will Soon Be Here...

Hillary Clinton needs your help picking a campaign song.

You can hear the short list and vote for your pick here.

Now, in my humble opinion some of the songs on the short list belong on the short bus, but I can't come up with a decent write in vote (The theme to the Mary Tyler Moore show? Something by NWA maybe?) so we'd better work with what we have. Let's break it down...

City of Blinding Lights by U2

While I understand the temptation to pick a song by the insanely popular do-gooder Bono why go with something that has such a lackluster tempo and lyrics like "I knew much more then than I do now"? Also, doesn't the title make you think of Ronnie's "Shining City on the Hill" stuff? I don't think she wants to go there. I mean, as another campaign song famously pointed out, yesterday is GONE.

Suddenly I See by KT Tunstall

Tunstall is a pretty good singer/songwriter...from England. Does Hillary want to take over for Tony Blair? Doesn't she realize if she out sources her campaign song Lou Dobbs will go all Old Testament on her ass? Besides, with an opening lyric like "Her face is a map of the world"...well, we don't want to start a dialogue about botox, do we? I didn't think so. I didn't think so.

I'm a Believer by Smash Mouth

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. Let's see....how can we take a CRAP Boomer song and make it more crap? Have some crap band from the 90's make it grungy! I hate this song. I hate it like poison. I hate it like Hillary hates the fact that she voted for the War.

Get Ready by The Temptations

I love the Temptations. I think an upbeat Motown tune would be a great choice. I'm not so sure about this one. While "Never met a girl who makes me feel the way that you do" is a great opening to the song, is it right for the "girl" who wants to be the first female president? I mean, I'm ALL about owning my femininity and stuff, but I'm not Hillary. She's got to be careful. There is a nice little sax solo in the middle of the tune that Bill could play though, if the opportunity arose...

Ready to Run by The Dixie Chicks

"What's all this talk about love? I'm ready to run!"


Again, I get why the Chicks would be a good choice to rally the anti-Bush base, but Hillary won't be running against the memory of Bush if she gets the nomination, she'll be running against (in all likelihood) a Republican who has a better voting record on the War than she does. Bitching about Bush won't be the answer in this campaign. And I like the Chicks, but it's too twangy to be mainstream.

Rock this Country! by Shania Twain

Say WHAT now? Trampy girl from Timmons? That Shania Twain? While this Canadian girl might make the NASCAR Dads hot you gotta wonder about this lyric: "I woke up this morning with a buzz rollin' round in my brain. I haven't been drinkin' but it feels pretty good, just the same". If Hillary goes with this she'd better see if Chanel will make her suits with midriff baring jackets. You gotta commit.

Beautiful Day by U2

This might be the perfect campaign song. It's upbeat and full of optimism, it sounds current, but not too cutting edge and it's sung by the world's last great hope, the aforementioned Bono. One problem. It's so good, it's already been used to death. I'm guessing that every High School election has at least two candidates using this song. Somebody else used this song recently...who was that...? Oh, right, JOHN KERRY! That's what you want to do. Remind everybody of why they didn't vote for your party last time.

Right Here, Right Now by Jesus Jones

Almost as bad as the Smash Mouth tune. Hate. It. Jesus Jones = utter crap. And I think this has already been used in a car commercial or something.

I'll Take You There by The Staple Singers

And we have a WINNER! It's got the right upbeat tempo, without feeling frantic. It's funky, which to me displays an air of confidence. The message in the lyric is perfect. Mavis Staples is a WOMAN with a strong, confident voice. I would follow her through flames, I think. Maybe Mavis Staples should run for President? The thing this song does that the others do not is inspire. The Staples Singers came from Soul and Gospel world into the mainstream R&B world and they took that church choir vibe with them. As Mavis herself put it "When we heard Dr. Martin Luther King preach, we said, 'If he can preach this, we can sing it.'"

I like this one so much, I think Obama should use it too.

What's got your vote?


  1. Seriously she needs to use Beyonce's Irreplaceable and then we can all do the "to the left, to the left..."(pardon the pun) and she can can get all excited at the part where it goes "you must not know bout me"
    Love Hilary!!!

  2. I don't even know these songs, but you made me laugh out loud.

  3. While it is a personal dream of mine to someday have my own theme song, I have yet to hear one associated with a political campaign that doesn't make me roll my eyes or laugh out loud. If they must go that route let them hire a jingle writer.

  4. Funny as Hell!

    Lou Dobbs going "Old Testament" is:
    1) Very likely to happen
    2) Scares me

    I love the MTM theme song, and since it won't work for my candidate, Mr. John Edwards, I say Hillary can have the song. I have a beret I can lend her.

  5. Imagine - John Lennon.

    Great post!

  6. Can I make some alternative suggestions?

    That's All Lies - Jet
    Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is - Jet
    Fell on Black Days - Soundgarden
    Cold Hard Beyotch - Jet
    Sworn and Broken - The Screaming Trees
    Been Caught Stealing - Jane's Addiction
    Blue Dress - Depeche Mode
    Money Can't Buy It - Annie Lennox
    Dollar Bill - The Screaming Trees
    We Care A Lot - Faith No More
    Electioneering - Radiohead
    You Turn The Screws - Cake
    In Need of a Miracle - New Radicals
    Never Again - Kelly Clarkson


  7. Ok, "I'll Take You There" is a great one. I'll hop right on that bandwagon and shake my thing.

    Given Hillary's time in Arkansas, though, how about "I Got a Honky-Tonk Badonkadonk" as 1st runner-up?

    And if you like Jane's Addiction, which I very sincerely do, how about this one: "Classic Girl."


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