He's at it again. Senator Rick Santorum was all over the news shows this past week promoting his new book "It Takes a Family" (gag) and picking a fight with Senator Hillary Clinton (author of "It Takes a Village") over the "correct" way to raise a child. First of all, this whole scenario is just nonsense. I mean if I was looking for child-rearing advice I'd go to Dr. Spock or Marilyn Dennis or that toothless homeless guy on the corner. What I would not do is go seek counsel from two US Senators.
"Excuse me, Senator Santorum, my baby won't sleep through the night...do you have any advice on how I can get him to sleep?"
"The right to privacy doesn't exist in my opinion of the United States constitution."
"Um, okay...but he's colicky I think. Anything for colick?"
"Marriage doesn't include homosexuality. It's not, you know, man on child or man on dog, or dog on your baby or whatever the case may be either."
"Senator Santorum! Nobody is trying to fuck my baby. He's just colicky."
Asshole.
When I asked Senator Clinton the same question she gave me some line about making sure I gave my man head every night. That's no help either.
But I still like her better.
And so does my man.
Boom chick-a!
I think that perhaps we should put this little war of the words on ice until the Santorum brats are old enough to have a chat with Chelsea and they can let us know who the better Mommy is - Rick Santorum, the bigot, or Hillary Clinton, the woman Santorum likes to call a "radical feminist".
Radical (political views):
Favouring or effecting fundamental or revolutionary changes in current practices, conditions, or institutions.
Feminism:
Belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes.
Guess I'm a radical feminist too. How do you like that!
There's a definition out there that's gaining a certain popularity. Syndicated Seattle based sex columnist and gay heathen Dan Savage has dubbed the "sometimes frothy, usually slimy, amalgam of lubricant, stray fecal matter and ejaculate that leaks out of the receiving partners anus after a session of anal intercourse" as get this...santorum. It's sweeping the nation. Santorum is sweeping the nation.
It's my hope that in ten years or so, a whole new generation of young gay men use the phrase santorum without knowing its etymology. He should really just disappear.
Pierre Trudeau was right, there's no place for the state in the bedrooms of the nation.
No comments :
Post a Comment